QNetworking can be the start of a
relationship. But how do you grow it from that start, and how do
you do it in a way that feels genuine?
ADavid Maister is well known writer on
issues facing professional service firms but his thoughts apply
much more widely. His 2005 article on an important aspect of client
relationship building - friendship - contains many transferable
lessons to networking. He provides advice from how (and why) to
make small talk, to the attitudes and approaches that help you
build social capital in meaningful and authentic ways.
Below, we provide the first part of his article and a click
through to the remainder that is published on his website.
The Right Attitudes
Most young professionals realize early in their careers that, at
some point, skill in generating business will be an important
determinant of their success. However, many believe that, in the
early stages of their career, they do not have much opportunity to
develop these skills.
This could not be further from the truth. True, few clients will
trust someone still "wet behind the ears" with their business, but
it is never too early (or, for that matter, too late) to begin the
process of learning how to earn and deserve trust.
The way most clients choose among professionals is essentially
identical to the way people choose their friends. At the point of
selecting a professional to work with, clients go with providers
who can (a) make them feel at ease; (b) make them feel comfortable
sharing their fears and concerns; (c) can be trusted to look after
them as well as their transaction and (d) are dependably on their
side.
Creating these feelings in others begins with the correct
attitudes (few people can make others think they care when they
don't) but also require the development of conversational and
interpersonal skills, which only come with practice.
If you have an active social circle and people like being with
you in your personal life, the odds are that you will have a
significant advantage in learning the skills and habits of business
development. If, on the other hand, you're a social recluse
personally, you will find it more difficult to get clients to see
you as the trusted advisor they wish to work with.
Two key points must be stressed. First, none of this means that
you can be anything less than excellent technically. The issue is
not whether you are competent or trustworthy, but whether or not
you are both.
Second, it is not necessary (or even always advisable) to
actually make your clients your best friends. Friendship skills,
while useful in both personal and professional life, can be put to
different purposes. But first you have to develop them.
Making Friends
I had to learn these lessons the hard way. For years, I have
worked for clients who have been gracious enough to invite me to
dinner the evening before or after my work with them. They weren't
trying to get more work out of me; they just wanted to be
sociable.
However, after a long day's work, the prospect of still being
"on duty" has not been attractive to me. It's not that I don't like
my clients, but that I prefer to unwind by being alone. I'm not
that sociable by nature. (I don't drink, I don't like sports. I
like the Bee Gees. You get the idea.).
This is something I now regret. I have missed a lot of
opportunities to form relationships with interesting people, and I
know it would have helped me a lot professionally to make the
gesture occasionally. I have tried to make up for it by being
attentive and dedicated to my clients on the work issues during
work hours, and to some extent that has been effective.
But I know I missed something important due to my social habits.
At a minimum, I have undercapitalized on the many opportunities
given to me to build profitable and fulfilling long-term client
relationships.
Continue reading here