Many members tell us that they find it challenging to manage both a full-time professional role and motherhood. The following comments are common:

I need more flexibility. I find myself day dreaming about working part-time, or perhaps contracting. The 'doom and gloom' conversations seem to be on the decline, but I'm nervous about making a change right now. Do you have any advice?

We turned to Philippa Weaver for her advice and that's what she had to say:

I strongly relate to your question, as I think most women will. Women require more flexibility in the way we earn our income than men. Eight till six at the office might impress our colleagues, but almost every woman I know who either works the expected salary hours, or runs her own business, feels as though "something is about to give". No matter how frantically we spin  we live in anticipation of crashing plates.

I knew my plates had smashed spectacularly when, on a business trip, I sat on the end of a hotel bed in Melbourne, expressing milk and weeping for my five month old daughter Honey, who was in Auckland crying for me. The agony of the moment led to a revolutionary moment as I promised myself I wouldn't live beholden to an employer any longer. There had to be a better way as a working mother.

In Desperation - A Solution

I craved flexibility, autonomy and the ability to manage my career on my own terms in a way that respected my skills and my situation. And I knew that I was not alone. A few months later, I took redundancy from my role as GM of a Sales and Marketing company and undertook the venture (short for adventure!) of starting my own business.

My desperation to create my own flexibility and autonomy as a working mum led me to create a tool which would allow others to achieve the same. This tool that I wanted but couldn't find was a place where people could market themselves for hire and in their own words. I launched my website, called Green Sky, as an open marketplace for anyone wanting to earn additional income: job seekers, contractors, self-employed people looking for extra clients, and people who want to offer their services to people in their community.

You Have Options!

The challenges you are facing are universal for working mothers. It is surprising that there are so few role-models of women 'successfully' managing to be there for their children and feeling fulfilled in their careers. This balance seems so elusive. The important thing is that we review our situation and realise that we have options.

When we feel overwhelmed, it is very common to have tunnel thinking. We lose our ability to think creatively or laterally about how we earn money. We tend to think of the job (or even the field of our career) as the only one possible. Our major clients can seem like the only ones we will ever have.

Therefore, we need to stretch ourselves to find new possibilities. As well as thinking 'Is there a way I could manage this job while spending fewer hours in the office?' or 'How can I satisfy my clients'demands in a more time effective way?' (these questions are a good start), I encourage you to challenge your status quo more broadly.

Fresh Perspective

Set aside some time, ideally when you are not feeling exhausted, and create a change of environment. Go to a new café or to the beach for a change of scenery. The most important aspect of reviewing your situation to allow yourself to make good decisions is finding your authenticity. You need to be honest with yourself and truly understand your motivations and desires, what is and isn't working in your situation right now, what you value most, where your fulfilment comes from, what you can and can't handle, and what you love.

Another approach is to create your dream scenario. Imagine your perfect working day and write it down in words without letting 'reality' get in the way. Reviewing the key elements of your perfect day may unlock insights for you. If you get stuck, use resources in any area you are unsure about. For example, the book "What colour is your parachute?" is a classic for career review.

Reviewing the way you earn your income may lead you to decide to maintain your current role with more flexibility or it may lead you on another path. If at the end of your review process you have decided that you would like to stay in the job you have, but work more flexible hours, then you will want to speak with your employer.

Negotiating reduced hours with your employer:

Since the law changes were passed in 2007 requiring employers to take employees' personal circumstances into consideration, a lot has been written about asking for flexibility from employers. For example, to keep good staff and to reduce staff costs, many employers are willing to accommodate staff wishing to work a four day week.

I did this myself when my first daughter was born, and I know a single father who is doing the same. We shared our experiences that living on 80% of your normal salary and trying to do all of your job in four days is not a winning formula, so be very careful to ensure you negotiate the corresponding reduction in the tasks you are responsible for.

We naturally want to protect the seniority we have worked so hard for, so while it's important to reduce tasks, it can be difficult to manage maintaining full responsibility for the role you have. I suggest scheduling regular meetings with your manager to ensure that the reduced hours are working for both you and the for your employer.

Ensure that the day you nominate as your day off is not a day you are likely to be regularly asked to come into the office for 'important unexpected meetings'. However, flexibility on your side is also very important to ensure this arrangement will work successfully.

Taking your career into your own hands

If your review led you to consider additional career options, then read on. Amy Tiemann (author of "Mojo Mom: Nurturing your self while raising a family") made some interesting comments in a recent interview. She talked about the need to be prepared to take our careers into our own hands, because there is little we can do as individuals to ensure that enlightened employers will be willing to create the ideal working situation for us.

I encourage all women to learn about entrepreneurship. If the traditional working world won't accommodate you, how can you create a role for yourself? One of my friends is a mother of three young boys and a veterinarian. She created her own mobile veterinary practice that allows her total control of her schedule, reduces her overhead because she has a van and makes house calls, rather than running a traditional practice, and serves her clients extremely well. That's the kind of creative solution we need to explore.

Self-employment and flexible employment are two great options for women because of the flexibility they offer us. Self employment may be running your own business, contracting or offering your services to people in your community. Flexible employment may be part-time work, contracting or project work for an employer. Here are some flexible options to consider, and real examples of women who are creating the flexibility they desire:

Contracting: Create the flexibility you need

Lynda has two school aged sons and a golf habit, so working full-time is not an option. Finding a part-time job that allows school holidays off and an obliging attitude to sick days if she has a child at home is a constant dilemma. She chooses to contract to employers. She has a few companies who use her administration expertise on a semi-regular basis. She uses her Green Sky profile to let prospective employers know that she is available. On her profile, she communicates that she doesn't work during school holidays and will only consider roles which work around school hours. Prospective employers approach her through the website, and as they have already read about her availability on her profile, she doesn't have to face interview situations thinking "when should I mention my circumstances?"

Work remotely: Yes, you can be brilliant in your pyjamas

No matter how much we adore fabulous shoes, we all from time to time dream of working in slippers. For some of us, it makes perfect sense. Judith lives 25 minutes from Kerikeri and there are not an abundance of jobs in her region. She is a skilled copy-editor and has won two contracts through Green Sky. She was even hired by a website in Boston, showing the world-wide-web at work. For women with young children, this is an ideal solution

Portfolio careers: Spice it up with variety

The days of people defining themselves by their profession eg "I am an accountant" and staying in that profession for life are all but gone. One of the ways of the future is to use multiple skills and experience to create portfolio careers and mix it up. Creating more than one revenue stream allows you to explore new avenues. Being so multi-everything-ed, women are ideally suited to lead this trend!

Follow your passion (even if you are not professionally qualified)

Earning an income doing what you love has been written about endlessly, but for many of us the risk of throwing in a secure income to follow our passion feels too risky. For people in this situation, what's needed is a vehicle for people to dip their toe in the water with no risk. Take Wendy. She's a fabulous photographer with a gift for making people feel, and look, amazing. Without formal training, however, she wondered how she would market a new business. She showcases her photos on her Green Sky profile so people can see how good she is. She appreciates the fact that she can 'confess' her amateur status too...

I'll give Amy Tiemann the last word as she summarises my message with such clarity.

Women reinvent themselves all the time. So for the lifelong career path, don't peg yourself too closely with one role or job title. Learn to value the skills you have and think about how to use those skills in a variety of job settings.

 

Acknowledgement

Philippa Weaver has an academic and corporate background. In 2008, she launched Green Sky, a new approach to hiring and being hired. It provides an open marketplace for people to promote themselves; whether they are a job seeker, a contractor, a business owner, or offering services in the informal economy.

Use the promotional code Professionelle and get Green Sky's premium profile free for 12 months